Just when you thought you’d be single for yet another Valentine’s Day…
Just when I think I’ve seen it all, I come across a website that offers its users the ability to build his or her own virtual girlfriend or boyfriend. Essentially perfect for all those who watched the 2013 film, Her, and thought, “A relationship with your device or tablet is totally normal.”
Before you attend yet another wedding without your Plus One or answer another dreaded, “Do you have a Valentine?” question – consider this; for only $24.99 per month, you, my friend (who may be in desperate need of a social outing) can have your very own custom-made girlfriend or boyfriend.
According to the site, “Invisible Girlfriend, and its partner service Invisible Boyfriend, lets you explore a relationship with a girlfriend or boyfriend but without all the baggage that comes with dating. You can create your ideal girlfriend, customizing their personality and even how you met. You can then interact with them via text message.” And yes, they have real humans playing your girlfriend on the other side. Fem-bots are so 1990’s.
The site is banking on a population of singles eager to finally let their guards down and be their true selves. The creators realize most people have baggage and it’s hard to find people that meet your expectations. Rather then go through the trouble of finding that compatible mate, you can “explore a relationship with a conversational companion without the trouble of dating. Many people use the service to practice dating, or just gain the confidence to start dating.”
Luckily, the person you’re messaging remains anonymous and so does your identity, phew! “Everything is confidential. The writers only see your first name, city or region, the last few messages, and the personality you crafted for your invisible girlfriend. There’s no way for them to identify you. That’s the beauty of the service: you get to practice texting with real humans without worrying about them judging or rejecting you.”
Not to worry, should you fall deeply in love with your fictional partner, you can always purchase more texts…and they say love is priceless. Unfortunately for all those out there hoping to work on their sexting game, the company frowns upon such activity and will temporarily suspend your account should you write anything dirty or R-rated.
However, aware that we get that sudden rush of dopamine every time our screen lights up with a new message waiting to be read, the creators of the site advise you strongly to avoid falling in love with your invisible mate. For that, they recommend you meet a real person. Good luck with answering the, “When was your last relationship?” question once you do opt for real people again.
Real dating might be tough after you’ve dated the quintessential version of your perfect partner, though. The site explains your girlfriend will be easy to talk to, she’ll be the girl you can be yourself around, the girlfriend you’ve always wanted; someone who always responds, someone who happens to have all of the same interests as you (aka not robotic or disturbing that she won’t have any of her own opinions at all).
A common concern for users who’ve taken this route to convince their friends or family members they’re in a healthy relationship is the lack of Facebook or other social media sites associated with this online man or woman. You can hear the rebuttal already, can’t you? “Who doesn’t have an Instagram or Facebook these days? Are you sure you’re not being ‘Catfished’?”
The creators behind this quirky concept realized they could take the relationship to the next level and offer you the option to send yourself a personalized letter or gift. That’s right – for another added fee, you can have a personalized package sent to your address for birthdays or holidays. Are you basically just sending yourself flowers or chocolates? Yes. Does that really matter after you’ve already taken the plunge at dating an imaginary person? No, I suppose not.
If my ostensive sarcasm hasn’t completely deterred you and you’re now curious about custom designing your own girlfriend or boyfriend for Valentine’s Day then power to ya! And please, I beg of you, reach out to me and tell me all about it should you find yourself scrolls-deep in an invisible relationship.
Laura C. Anderson | @s0mebl0nde
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