EAT YOUR HEART OUT 


Why a sexy woman pigging out on junk food really turns us on.


By: Laura C. Anderson


For this piece, a sexy friend of mine and I conducted an experiment to test out the real reason men cannot get enough of a curvy bombshell stuffing her face with fast food. Before I reveal the truth, I’ll show you the following images:

I give you this snapshot image from a Hardee’s commercial: 

These three photos of the famously seductive, Niykee Heaton: 

This video of Charlotte McKinney in a Carl Jr. commercial:

This image of the topless Audrina Partridge:

And lastly, this mind-blowing image of Hannah Ferguson:

Is it the saucy, juicy meat these women are shoving into their mouths turning us on? Yeah, that definitely has something to do with the attraction. Maybe it’s the fact the women are all greased and oiled up similar to how we might imagine their skin would glisten under lubrication. One thing is for sure: it’s H-O-T.

Carl Jr.’s and Hardee’s certainly caught on to how quickly their meaty burgers would sell if they had sexy celebrities and models practically having an orgasm while “eating” them. Sex sells everything and the only thing a man wants more than sex is food so no surprise there. But why is it so goddam hot to watch a half-naked supermodel scruff down a big mac and fries? Better question - how come Niykee Heaton covered in donuts gives us all the feels?

I don’t get it. Well – I didn’t – that was before I took my sexy friend, Jess, to a steak house during happy hour and asked her to sit at the bar in a skintight white dress and order a Hungry Man. For those unfamiliar, a Hungry Man is a triple-decker cheeseburger topped with fries, onion rings, tater-tots, and all the condiments. Yep, all the drippy, gooey, messy condiments we know and love.

We sat for fifteen minutes patiently waiting for her food to arrive. In that time the bar filled with men clutching beers and staring at the basketball game on the mounted television. Jess swept her long, black hair to the side, letting her golden tan really show under the lights. Her boobs were all but hoisted up to her chin with the push-up bra she managed to squeeze her DD’s into. Needless to say the men were staring.

And then the food arrived. Placed before my petite, busty bombshell friend was The Hungry Man in all its meaty glory. I’m pretty sure a few jaws hit the floor. Jess laced her perfectly manicured fingers around the ¾ pound burger and lifted it to her mouth. She cocked her head from one side to the other trying to figure out how she was even going to fit her mouth around it. It was boner central.

After three very messy bites I knew it was time. The men weren’t exactly in short supply so I knew it was the perfect opportunity I ask Jess’s newfound fan-club what they found so damn satisfying about watching her stuff her face. They were apprehensive to answer at first but in no time the responses were flying: 

1.     “It’s hot to see a sexy woman give into her guilty pleasures.”

2.     “She obviously takes care of herself so watching her let loose and eat junk food shows she’s not uptight.”

3.     “Honestly? I just kept picturing her giving me head.”

4.     “It shows how confident she is to be able to eat that in public.”

5.     “I think it’s sexy if a woman can not only hit the gym with me but chow down with me, too.”

6.     “There’s one thing I love more than a burger, a sexy woman eating a burger.”

7.     “She’s breaking the stereotype of hot women only ordering salads.”

8.     “Damn, she looks good getting dirty.”

9.     “A girl like that could be eating anything and look good doing it.”

10.    “Because it’s pleasurable for her to eat and you can see that on her face, it’s a huge turn on. You can’t                 help but wonder if you could pleasure her like that, too.”

I had heard enough. Jess and I paid for her almost $20 burger and thanked the guys for helping me out with my “research” before hitting the road. After the crowd she drew in it’s safe to say we’ll be leaving the sexy junk food eating to the professionals over at Carl Jr. and Hardee’s…


Laura C. Anderson | @s0mebl0nde


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